Why do the people closest to us often frustrate us the most?

Life Coach Newcastle
Picture of Mandy Beart
Mandy Beart

Repeated exposure to a situation or person that we find frustrating depletes our tolerance for frustration.  It’s easier to manage our frustration level at the beginning of an experience and with people we’ve just met; but, as time passes, and our frustration continues, our ability to manage it decreases.

Suppressing or ignoring frustration just makes it worse.  We move into a state of tunnel awareness, we fixate on our frustration, and we lose sight of anything good and positive about the situation or person.  The result is usually hurtful words, or negative actions, that we will regret.

A resourceful response to feeling frustration is feeling gratitude!  Next time you become frustrated try thinking about what you appreciate about the frustrating person or situation.

Gaining control over a frustrated outburst isn’t easy, and appreciating the people that we see every day, or are closest to, can be challenging.  They are the most likely to frustrate us, they are also usually the people that we are the most familiar with, so these are the people who are probably going to be the recipients of our frustration.  Remember this – we would not have these people in our lives if they did not add value and meaning, and reminding ourselves of their positive qualities shouldn’t actually be very difficult.

If we could cultivate an attitude of gratitude in our daily life by thinking of the things that we appreciate about the people who are closest to us, then we might be better prepared to call upon that gratitude to help us control our frustration in a crucial moment.

Does this article resonate for you in the context of your work or personal life? I can help you to overcome unwanted thoughts and behaviours. I offer professional life coaching and grief counselling services in Newcastle and Central Coast. Call +61 434 511 381



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